高考上海卷英语作文点评 发布时间：2019-06-08 15:52:23
高考上海卷英语作文点评
II. Guided Writing
Directions: Write an English composition in 120-150 words according to the instructions given in Chinese.
上海博物馆拟举办一次名画展，现就展出场所（博物馆还是社区图书馆）征集公众意见，假设你是王敏，给上海博物馆写一封信表达你的想法。你的信必须满足以下要求：
1. 简述你写信的目的及你对场所的选择；
2. 说明你的理由（从便利性，专业性等方面对这两个场所进行对比）
Dear Sir/ Madam,
I’ve just learned that Shanghai Museum is to hold a famous painting exhibition and you’re collecting public suggestions about which location to hold it. I’m writing this letter to share with you my opinions. As far as I’m concerned, it is more reasonable to hold the painting exhibition in Shanghai Museum than in community libraries. My reasons are as follows.
On the one hand, it is more convenient for people to reach Shanghai Museum, located in the center of the city. Visitors can go there by subway and bus and so on. What’s more, Shanghai Museum is much more extensive than community libraries, providing visitors with a more comfortable environment to appreciate the famous paintings.
On the other hand, Shanghai Museum, a well-known and distinguished museum at home and abroad, is more professional in holding painting exhibitions. What’s of great significance is that not only does it provide advanced facilities and high-tech monitors but also offers professional security guards to protect those famous paintings from being damaged or stolen in the process of exhibition.
Consequently, I strongly propose that the painting exhibition is to be held in the Shanghai Museum.
Yours,
Wang Min
赏析：
今年上海市的高考英语作文话题贴近学生的生活实际，用书信的载体呈现，让考生对画展感觉到有话可以说，但是想要达到A类作文，不仅需要有扎实语言功底，还需要对博物馆和社区图书馆及画展等生活类的语言应用娴熟，更需要学生从专业一点的角度，深入分析其选择的理由，这个层面很多学生很难用专业的语言区描述，学生平时学习时间紧张，没有时间到社会上参加一些社会活动，而且在紧张的时间里，更别提用一些复杂的语言结构区展示自己的理由，所以学生写到高分不是很容易，大部分学生得到15/16分是没有问题的。采取这样的命题思路对英语教学有较好的反馈作用，学校和家庭不仅仅督促学生的学习更要提供机会让孩子走出课堂，走向社会，培养学生创造性和批判性思维。
提示：
生活类词汇: museum library painting exhibition advanced facility high- tech monitor security guard
分词的应用：located providing distinguished
句型：主语从句 标语从句 倒装等
2012年上海高考英语作文
Directions: Write an English composition in 120 - 150 words according to the instructions given
below in Chinese.
上周一，你在一所小学观摩了小女孩Amy所在班级的两堂绘画课（如图所示），回家后你用英语写了一篇日记，内容包括：
● 对两堂绘画课的具体描述；
 ● 你从中获得的启发。
2012 Shanghai English Test writing sample 3
( for reference only )
Today I had an unusual experience , which refreshed my mind. With pupils I spent two periods of time in a primary school, watching them learn how to paint. A little girl named Amy, one student of the class, left me a deep impression with her unique painting.
In the first lesson the teacher required the pupils to paint freely. Namely , in any way they could draw whatever they’d like to. Amy was the first one to have a try. I saw her think for a little while, take off her shoes, then dip her feet slightly into the paint/ink. Much to my surprise, in a flash she managed to make a nice design on a broad piece of white paper/blanket with both of her feet. What happened next, various of types of works painted by other children appearing before my eyes one by one ,kept me laughing with joy and amusement.
Following a break, the second class began. smiling ,the teacher made a brief comment, which was full of praise as well as appreciation. After that ,she gave the students some guidance about the traditional way of painting. With her teachers’ words in mind , Amy practiced again. Painting-brush in hand ,she sat a desk properly/straight ,paying full attention to her work. This time，with ease and excitement she drew some birds flying high in the sky /sun.
Looking back at the two ways of giving a class, I have to admit the teacher was well worth following in matters of cultivating “flowers” in the spirit of originality. Given that children are of great imagination and elasticity in their growth , they are supposed to be given as many chances and opportunities as possible in the course of being educated so as to develop their potential to the full. Were the young always confined to the established ways of doing things without a free world ,one that is also longed for by the ambitious birds drawn by Amy , how can we expect the next generation our civilized nation would be more innovative and creative ?
2012 Shanghai English Test writing sample 4
( for reference only )
Today I had an unusual experience , which refreshed my mind. With pupils I spent two periods of time in a primary school, watching them learn how to paint. A little girl named Amy, one student of the class, left me a deep impression with her unique painting.
In the first lesson the teacher required the pupils to paint freely. Namely , in any way they could draw whatever they’d like to. Amy was the first one to have a try. I saw her think for a little while, take off her shoes, then dip her feet slightly into the paint/ink. Much to my surprise, in a flash she managed to make a nice design on a broad piece of white paper/blanket with both of her feet. What happened next, various of types of works painted by other children appearing before my eyes one by one ,kept me laughing with joy and amusement.
Following a break, the second class began. With a smile ,the teacher made a brief comment, which was full of praise as well as appreciation. After that ,she gave the students some guidance about the traditional way of painting. With her teachers’ words in mind , Amy practiced again. Painting-brush in hand ,she sat a desk properly/straight ,paying full attention to her work. This time，with ease and excitement she drew some birds flying high in the sky /sun.
Simple and amusing as it seemed, the two ways of painting are thought-provoking. As is generally accepted ,students ,especially, children have great potential in their growth and development. As a matter of fact, whether their talents can be developed to the full, to a great degree, depends on how children are educated. While some valuable traditions are well worth cherishing, thinking in an original way should be encouraged and emphasized among children when it comes to teaching or education, who are supposed to be characterized by “innovation and creation ”. Only in this way, can they keep in pace with the fast-developing modern world.
2011年上海卷高考英语作文范话题：向一个基金会申请2000元做个项目来支持贫困学生，需要包含以下的一些要点1.介绍自己 2.项目具体实施方案 3.2000元如何利用
Dear foundation organizers,
My name is Jerry Lu, a student currently studying at Shanghai XX High school. I am writing, on behalf of my classmates, to apply for the 2000 yuan worth of fund in a bid to initiate a program aimed at helping those students who are financially disadvantaged.
Being raised in families that don’t have to worry about putting food on the table need not mean oblivion to our less fortunate peers. On this account, we would appreciate it if you could sponsor our poverty-relief endeavor. The following is how we would go about using the money. We would spend 1500 yuan purchasing some stationery for the needy students at our school. It is worth noting that we would inform them to pick up the school supplies themselves instead of us “doling out” the supplies so that we wouldn’t embarrass those who we want to help. The remainder of the fund would be used to invite a motivational speaker who was to talk about how to lift oneself out of poverty by making right academic and professional decisions.
Modest as our efforts may sound, we believe they will warm some hearts. Much obliged if you could reply at your earliest convenience.
Yours Sincerely,
Jerry Lu
2010年上海高考作文及范例
下图是小学新生的课堂一脚，对照你当时的上课情况，作出比较并谈谈你的感受。你的作文必须包括：
●描述图片里学生上课的场景
●比较你同时期的上课情况
●简单谈谈你的感受
As is described in the picture, a group of foreign students are raising their hands to give answers to the question in a joyful and active way. The purpose of the picture is to show us how active the class performance is in the foreign country.
Western students are more likely to be open-minded and willing to express their unique ideas in class. Just as the picture shows: When the teacher is asking a question, every child raises their hands and is eager to answer the question. They do not fear giving the in-class performance while others are watching.
This scene reminds me of my own class situation when I was at elementary school. As Chinese children are more often than not very conservative and modest, therefore, my teachers usually called a student's name if nobody dared to answer the questions. Then the appointed child behaved awkwardly and was reluctant to say just a few words.
This recollection makes me feel rather disappointed. In fact, we should at least give a try, whether the answer is perfect or not. It's a chance of learning, more specifically, if we are well-done, we will gain confidence; if not, we will get informed of a better solution, which will provide us experience in the later situation. All in all, it's more sensible to be active in class.
图画式议论文
1. 特点：
是通过观察和分析单幅或一组画，把图画内容转化成文
字信息。
2. 注意点：
(1). 要认真审图
(2). 需从整体上把握图画所呈现的主要内容，处理好人物与时空的
关系及局部与整体的关系，找出文章的线索或主题。
(3). “丰满的想象 + 变化的表达”
3. 结构：
第一段 描述图画，一般不超过三分之一篇幅
第二段 揭示画旨 （一般一言即可）
第三段 发表感想、评论或提出建议（占主要篇幅）
注意：二三两段可合成一段
2009年上海高考作文及范例
某海外学校举办英语夏令营，开设了如下课程：园艺（gardening），烹饪（cooking）,防身术（self- defence），护理（nursing）。假如你是王跃华（不可以用自己的真实姓名），写一封申请信，报名参加其中一门课程的学习。信的内容必须包括：
1、你感兴趣的课程
2、你期望从这门课程中学到什么
3、为什么想学这些内容
It is said that a summer camp is to be held by your school and a few courses are available to choose from. I am interested in gardening, in that I believe it features my character and personal benefits.
During the learning period, I expect to gain some unexpected knowledge. A radical technique I’d like to obtain is to know how to tell different species of plants and flowers apart. This helps me to have a clear outlook of those in my garden. Furthermore, the proper cutting time and frequency to water are some other skills I want to learn. A little knowledge concerning choosing suitable soil or the reasonable planting positions will also be a good choice.
The mani reason why I choose gardening is that I want to help my parents with their work in the domestic garden. In addition, I find that we students generally lack the knolwdge of gardening, missing a chance to have a word with nature, so that knowing the surroundings is imperitave. Last but not least, by attending the course, I will have a meaningful summer vacation, and drowning myself bewteen plants will by all means add a brilliant touch to my life.
2008年上海高考作文及范例
你班将组队参加学校组织的集体舞比赛（group dancing cooipetition)，班长希望大家积极参加。对此谈谈你的看法。
你的文章必须包括以下内容：
·你是否会参加比赛
·你做出该决定的具体理由
Version 1:
A group dancing competition will be held in our school and the monitor calls on everybody to take an active part in it. While most of my classmates are still hesitating whether to participate, I have said yes to our monitor with great pleasure.
Generally speaking, there are two reasons for my decision. First, it is a good opportunity for me to relax myself, which will enable me to study more efficiently. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, so goes the saying, which clearly shows us the importance of relaxation. Besides, I think I am a good dancer after learning dance for more than five years. Participating in the contest will be a golden chance for me to show my dancing skills and make some contributions to the class.
For the two reasons mentioned above, it is no surprise that I have such a strong enthusiasm on the group dancing competition.
Version 2:
Today the monitor calls on everybody to take an active part in the group dancing competition which will be held in a couple of days in our school. But after some careful consideration, I have decided not to participate.
There are a number of reasons for my decision. First and foremost, as the College Entrance Exam is just around the corner, study is the top priority for me. Participating in the group dancing competition has to give way because it might take me too much time. What’s more, without any experience of dancing, I don’t think I can be a good dancing partner. I am afraid my poor dancing skills will probably spoil the performance of the whole class. In this case, it’s better for me to be a spectator cheering for my classmates.
For these reasons, it seems more appropriate for me to watch the competition than to dance myself.
2007年上海高考作文及范例
以“礼物”为主题写一篇作文。该文章必须包括以下内容：
你送礼物的对象及所送的礼物；
该礼物对他（她）可能产生的影响或带来的变化。
A Present for Father’s Day
The Father’s Day will come soon. and I want to give my Dad a present. That is a VIP card of a health club. When I was a little boy, Dad worked hard as a teacher. During term, Mother and I sometimes accompanied Dad in his office till a late hour. From then on, I understood that Dad worked with great effort. There are still too many precious memories which I’ll cherish in my heart. And I want to give this present to express my thanks to him.
Time flies and I’m 18 now. As I grow up, Father is getting older. He is now still diving into piles of books. With the health club membership, I hope that he will make time to do more exercises. I think that he will relax in the health club and make more friends.
2006年上海高考作文及范例
下表提供了你所心仪的南、北两所大学的招生信息。通过比较作出选择，并结合个人情况说明理由。
|
|
南方大学 |
北方大学 |
|
学费 |
8000元/年 |
5000元/年 |
|
招生人数 |
20人 |
10人 |
|
优惠政策 |
无 |
加20分 |
Version A
Of the two universities listed above, I prefer the one in the north. The main reason is that the tuition is only 5,000 RMB for the university a year, compared with 8,000 RMB for the university in the south. This makes a big difference for a family like a mine, because my father is peasant and the only breadwinner in the family. Studying at the northern university can save my father big money.
Another reason I take into consideration is the preference policy the northern university offers. Any candidate who chooses to study there may gain an extra 20 points, which greatly raises the possibility of my being admitted to this university. Of course, it doesn't mean that it will be quite easy to pass the entrance exam because this university has limited the number of qualified candidates to 10 only. However, I have been doing quite well in school, so I believe I can pass the entrance exam with flying colors.
Version B
Compared with the northern university, the southern one is more to my liking. It is true that in terms of tuition the former is 3,000 RMB cheaper than the latter. However, that's not a problem to me because I can work my way through college once I get admitted. What counts is the reputation it has. Once I enter this school, my future career is guaranteed.
Also, the university in the south recruits 20 new students instead of 10, which means that I will stand a better chance of getting admitted. The competition is very keen, though, as you can see because this university doesn't give candidates any extra points. So all I can do now is study hard, pass the tough entrance exam, and qualify as a student of the university of my choice.
2005年上海高考作文及范例
古人云：“天生我材必有用” 请你描述你生活中的一件事，说明人各有所长，无论才能大小都能成为有用的人。
Many people, especially those who think they are not as talented as others, tend to give up in their undertakings and thus complain about life. Such people will certainly end up getting nowhere. Notice that most successful people are not unlike us. What makes them stand out is their devotedness to the job they are doing, which is typical of the story of Li Dahua, a neighbor of mine.
Dahua was brought up in a poor family. Since he didn't do well in school, he joined his father in collecting garbage for a living soon after he graduated from elementary school. His neighbors shook their heads whenever they saw him, thinking that this boy would by no means carve out a bright future. Years passed by, and Dahua kept collecting garbage, but he took one step further. Through books he knew how to sort out the waste he had collected and have it recycled. You know what? He has set up a recycling factory and become the richest man in town! His success proves the ancient Chinese saying: "There must be a use for my talent."
2004年上海高考作文及范例
老师要求你负责班级墙报(wall newspaper)工作并征求你的意见。在日记中表述你的决定并谈谈想法。
My Diary
Thursday, March 11
This morning my headmaster had a chat with me. He told me that he decided to choose me to be in charge of the class wall newspaper. He wants to kinow if I am willing to accept the task and what I plan to do for it.
First of all, I would like to say I would always set a high value on doing a service for the class. So I’m only too willing to be in charge of the wall newspaper. As a student, to do my bit for our class is a good way to put my ability to good use. To help run the wall newspaper can give ful play to my talent. We all know our society needs people full of creativity anf creativity doesn’t come from books but from practice. The wall newspaper provideds me with a chance to practise. I’m sure I can benefit a lot from it.
Secondly, I regard the wall newspaper as a window of our class. It serves as a bridge between the teachers and the students. With the active participation of the whole class I can have it published every two weeks. Through the wall newspaper we can exchange our ways of learning, freely communicate our views on school life, voice our concerns over health cares and even make proposals on the teaching method and the testing system. Some of my classmates are good at drawing. They can help to add colour to the wall newspaper.
I hope my ideas for the wall newspaper will meet with the teacher’s favourable consideration.
2003年上海高考作文及范例
你的好友因家境一般买不起名牌而闷闷不乐。给他写封信，谈谈你的看法和建议。
收信人： 徐海青
寄信人： 黄平（不可用自己的真实姓名）
写信日期：2003年6月8日
June 8, 2003
Dear Xu Haiqing,
You said in your letter that many of your classmates were wearing fashionable clothes, but you couldn’t afford to buy the best brands. So you flet very depressed. There are different views on people’s wear. The following are my ideas about it.
Firstly, you shouldn’t put too much emphasis on physical appearance. You must always remember the most important task for you today is to concentrate your attention on your studies. No matter what you wear, you will really look your best when you come out first in your examinations.
As a famous saying goes, “Grugality(节俭) is the mother of virtue.” So, secondly, you must understand that it is a fine virtue to learn to live in frugality will benefit you a lot in your later life.
I hope you understand what I mean. I am sure you will take a positive attitude towards life and will be happy again when you read my letter.
Bet Regards,
Huang Ping
2002年上海高考作文及范例
2002秋季高考
II. Guided Writing
Directions: Write an English composition in over 120 words based on the picture and the instructions given below.
简要描述图片内容，结合生活实际，就图片的主题谈谈自己的感想。
Due to the one-child policy in China, most families have only one child and therefore this child is regarded as the treasure of the whole family. Both the parents and grandparents usually spoil the child too much.
As is depicted in the picture, when a child is learning to ride a bicycle, her parents and grandparent are sweating, running alongside the bike and trying their best to protect the child for fear that she should fall and get hurt.
We all know the greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. So I think, for the parents, they should be aware of the negative effect too much spoiling has on their child. Under the parents’ protection, the child knows only comfort and ease. If they don’t learn how to live independently, how can they cope with the hardships and trials which they will meet in the future? For the children, they should let their parents know that they have confidence in themselves and are able to exist in the competitive community without the constant watchful eye of an eager parent.
The path to success is filled with various kinds of difficulties and obstacles. Only when we have learned to stand on our own feet, can we survive the challenging world.
(219 words)
2002年春季高考
根据所给图表，简要描述某城市近年每百人手机（mobile phone）用户增长情况，并试分析其增长原因。
More and more people have mobile phones in recent years , shown as the above diagram. In 1995, only one person in a hundred had a mobile phone in some city. 10 people in a hundred had mobile phones. The number of the people who had mobile phones was ten times as many as in 1995. In 1999, there were 20 people in a hundred who had mobile phones. In 2001, a half of the people in a hundred had mobile phones.
There are several reasons for the increase of the number of people having mobile phones.
Firstly, mobile phones are useful in people’s life. We can communicate with others very conveniently. We can take photos and even surf the Net with the latest model. Secondly, people’s income has been increasing quickly, and the mobile phones are cheaper than before. In this case, people can afford a mobile phone.
For the two reasons mentioned above, it is no surprise that so many people have bought cell phones and this trend will not stop in the near future.
图表式作文的几种形式:
一是以表格形式,将统计的数据或被说明的事物直接用表格形式体现出来,即统计表。
二是以图形形式
A 表示数据变化的曲线图;
B 表示数据的大小或数量之间的差异
的柱状图;
C 表示总体内部结构变化的扇形图。
图表式作文写作分三步:
第一步：开门见山地点明本图表所反映的主题。
常使用的词汇有:table, chart, figure, graph, describe// tell, show, represent等
常用句型：
1.The graph/chart/table above shows …
2. From the above graph/chart, it can be seen that...
3. As is shown in the graph, ...
4.The chart/table shows the differences between…
第二步：分析数据间的主要差异及趋势，然后描写（在描写数据间变化及总趋势特征时，可采用分类式或对比式以支持主题，并阐明必要的理由）。注意层次。 即 facts and reasons
常用转折，对比及比较的词汇：
While, but, on the contrary, however, compare with, in contrast to ,as…as, the same as, be similar to, be difference between, among, more than, less than
常用描写趋势变化的词汇： Increase, rise, go up, reduce, drop, go down, fall, reach, remain, by/to, slowly, slightly, gradually, sharply, rapidly, the number of…, from…to及比较级，倍数句型等。
常用句型：
Facts:
1.There was a great /slight increase /rise in…
2.There has been a sudden/slow/rapid fall/drop in…
3.It is 20% lower/higher than…
4.The number /rate has nearly doubled, as against that of last year.
5.The number is …times as much as that of….
6.It increases/rises/decreases/reduces by…/…% / two thirds.
7.By comparison with…,it decreased/increased/fell from…to…
Reasons:
1.The reason for…is that…
2.One may think of the change as a result of…
3.The change in…largely results from the fact that…
4.There are several causes for this significant growth in….First,….Second,…
5.This brings out the important fact that…
6. The following reasons are responsible for …
第三步：归纳总结或发表评论。
常用词汇：
1.in a word,/ in short, /generally speaking
2.It’s clear from the chart that…
3.In summary, it is important…
4.From what has been discussed above, we can draw the conclusion that…
5.Obviously, if we want to…,it is necessary…
6.There is no doubt that attention must be paid…
第四步：如果要求谈谈感受
As far as I am concerned, …
2001年上海高考作文及范例
请你谈谈轿车大量进入家庭后，对家庭、环境和经济可能产生的影响。
Nowadays the number of people who own private cars is on the rise. Like everything else, private cars have both favorable and unfavorable aspects. Generally, the favorable aspects can be listed as follows.
First, private cars can bring convenience and mobility to owners. A car allows a person to move comfortably and safely as well as quickly and freely. Because my family owns a car, we are able to make extensive journeys every year. Therefore, I believe the tourist industry in China will develop more quickly with the increase in the number of private cars. Secondly, if more people buy cars, the automobiles industry will develop dramatically. What’s more, the growth of the automobile industry can trigger the boom of other important and related industries such as iron and steel production, energy and technological application.
Every coin has two sides. The negative aspects are also apparent. To begin with, too many cars will give rise to a series of problems, such as serious environmental pollution and more traffic accidents. In addition, the driver may have drive around and around looking for available parking spaces.
Through above analysis, we can see that private cars should be restricted rather than encouraged. (199 words)
2000年上海高考作文及范例
1。我最难忘的一课 2。具体说明为何难忘 3。感想
An Unforgettable Lesson
In my life I have experienced many important things. But perhaps the most unforgettable thing which is really worth mentioning is the lesson given by my Chinese teacher just after she had an accident.
One morning just before our Chinese lesson, we were told our Chinese teacher, Miss Liu, had had an accident. One of her legs was badly injured and she couldn’t come to teach us. While we were planning to visit her after school, we also thought that maybe we would be free to do whatever we wanted during our Chinese lesson, and hoped our homework load would be reduced. But to our surprise, shortly after the bell, Miss Liu, with the help of a stick, came to the door of our classroom. With great respect w all stood up and greeted her.
She sat on a chair and began her lesson. She spoke slowly but forcefully. She prepared her lecture quite well and demanded that we do the same. Towards the end of the lesson, we got lots of homework from her.
A good teacher is many things to many people. Everyone has definite ideas about what a good teacher is. In my opinion the teachers who demanded the most from the students are perhaps liked best. (210 words)
1999上海高考作文及范例
一些学生认为学英语很重要；一些学生则认为不必学英语；我认为。。。。。。（观点、理由）
Some students think it is very important to master English. They believe “A foreign language is a weapon in the struggle of life”, Others consider English useless. They feel learning English is nothing but a burden to them.
In my opinion, English is one of the most important subjects we learn at school. Of all subjects I like English best.
There are several reasons why English is my favorite subject.First, English is one of the most widely used languages of the world. Nearly all information on the Internet and over half of the world’s technical materials are in English, thus a good command of English will greatly benefit me in my work. Secondly，it is believed that good English also leads to greater chances and opportunities. In the competition for a well-paid job, the one who can speak English has an advantage over those who cannot.
For all these reasons we should not only learn English but master it in the shortest time possible. (166words)
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班主任 
课本 
作文
小升初
美术
